Hear my Call

"Hear My Call"

[Verse 1]
Here I am again asking questions,
Waiting to be moved.
I am so unsure of my perception,
What I thought I knew I don't seem to
Where is the turn so I can get back to what I believe in?
Back to the old me and

[Chorus]
God, please hear my call.
I am afraid for me.
Love has burned me raw
I need your healing
Please, please, please.

[Verse 2]
I am such a fool
How did I get here?
Played by all the rules
Then they changed
I am but a child to your vision
Standing in the cold and the rain
Lost here in the dark
I can't see my foot to take a step,
What is happening?
Oh, this hurts so bad. I can hardly breathe.
I just want to leave so...

[Chorus]
God, please hear my call.
I am afraid for me.
Love has burned me raw
I need your healing
Please,
God, please hear my call.
I am afraid for me.
Love has burned me raw
I need your healing
Please, please, oh, please, please.

God please hear my call.
I am afraid.
Love has turned me cold,
I need your healing.
Please, please, please, please, please, please.

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jillscott/hearmycall.html

Love

"Love"

[Verse 1]

I used to think that I wasn't fine enough
And I used to think that I wasn't wild enoughBut I won't waste my time tryin' to figure out
Why you playing games, whats this all about
And I can't believe,
Your hurting me
I met your girl, what a difference
What you see in her
You ain't seen in me
But i guess it was all just make-believe
[Chorus]

Oh, Love
Never knew what I was missing
But I knew once we start kissin'
I found..... I found you......
Love
Never knew what I was missin'
But I knew once we start kissin'
I found..... I found you.....

[Verse 2]

Now you're gone, what am I gonna do
So empty
My heart, my soul can't go on
Go on without you....
My rainy days fade away when you,
Come around please tell me baby
Why you go so far away
Why you go...

[Chorus]

Love......
Never knew what I was missing
But I knew once we start kissin'
I found..... I found you......
Love
Never knew what I was missin'
But I knew once we start kissin'
I found..... I found you.....

Who would have known.
I'd find you.

Now you're gone, what am I gonna do
So empty
My heart, my soul can't go on
Go on baby without you....
Rainy days fade away
When you come around
Say your here to stay
With me boy
I don't want you to leave me
I need you.........

[Chorus]

Love ~ Keyshia Cole http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/keyshiacole/love.html

 

Self Reflection

In the course of being me I realized something important about me. I thought (and I dont know why) I was a pretty good communicator. But the other day going over my past relationships I noticed that this trait has deminished quickly. My communication skills have pretty much disappeared. Too many battle scars I guess. And then it doesnt help to realize (although I already knew, but this was a brutal reminder) that age does not denote maturity.
When I look back on my life its a wonder I talk to people at all. I have a bunch of chips on my shoulders. And a few friendships that faded away to things of the past. Some uncontrollably and others, its just better to let them go. I could see the ineviditable coming. When it comes down to it. I'm just tired. Tired of people and tired of drama.
I realize that I have my own special way of seeing things. My own special way of processing things. Attempts to change my thinking are truly futile. Most people want you to think like them or they judge you for thinking differently. I'm tired of the whole charade.
Down the rabbit hole I go, maybe I'll resurface on Ground Hogs Day. But I'm really cool off of those who cant let me be, and work out my issues naturally.
Matters of the heart are always difficult to decide for. To have the weight of the world also looming over you is too much to bare.

PayPhone - Maroon 5

Payphone"(feat. Wiz Khalifa)

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?

Yeah, I, I know it's hard to remember,
The people we used to be...
It's even harder to picture,
That you're not here next to me.

You say it's too late to make it,
But is it too late to try?
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down

I've wasted my nights,
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed,
Still stuck in that time,
When we called it love,
But even the sun sets in paradise

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?

If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like thisAll those fairy tales are full of it.
 One more stupid love song, I'll be sick
Oh, you turned your back on tomorrow
'Cause you forgot yesterday.
I gave you my love to borrow,
But you just gave it away.

You can't expect me to be fine,
I don't expect you to care
I know I've said it before,
But all of our bridges burned down

I've wasted my nights,
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed,
Still stuck in that time,
When we called it love,
But even the sun sets in paradise

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?

If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like thisAll those fairy tales are full of it.
 One more stupid love song, I'll be sickNow I'm at a payphone

[Wiz Khalifa:]
Man, f... that s...
I'll be out spending all this money
While you're sitting round wondering
Why it wasn't you who came up from nothing,
Made it from the bottom
Now when you see me I'm stunning,
And all of my cars start with a push of a button

Telling me the chances I blew up
Or whatever you call it,
Switch the number to my phone
So you never could call it,
Don't need my name on my shirt,
You can tell it I'm ballin.

Swish, what a shame could have got picked
Had a really good game but you missed your last shot
So you talk about who you see at the top
Or what you could have saw but sad to say it's over for.
Phantom pulled up valet open doors
Wiz like go away, got what you was looking for
Now it's me who they want, so you can go and take
that little piece of s... with you.

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?

If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like thisAll those fairy tales are full of it.
 One more stupid love song, I'll be sickNow I'm at a payphone.....

PMS

"PMS"

I wanna talk to the ladies tonight
About situation I'm pretty sure y'all be able to relate to
Trust me

Today I'm not feelin pretty
See I'm feeling quite ugly
Havin one of this days
When I cant make up my mind
So don't even look at me
See I don't wanna hear your problem
Cause I'm having some of my own
I know it was not your fault
That I'm feelin down
I just wanna be left alone

Down I'm down and out in depression
I think the worst of everything
My lower back is achin'
And my clothes don't fit
Now aint that a bitch

Got an attitude and I aint talkin to you
Only if the shoe'd fit
I don't care what you think about me
I don't need you cryin' around me
Don't need your sympathy
I don't need it, no no
PMS

Go through something in nights
Is the some at day
I don't need to understand
Where I'm coming from tonight
See I'm feelin messin
Told you, you would be able to late tonight
My lower back is achin'
PMS

And I don't know what I'm gonna do
I'm fulled stressed
I want y'all to hear what I'm sayin
PMS, PMS, PMS

Understand what I'm sayin tonight
Understand where I'm comin from
Feelin really bitch yeah
And I don't feel like be a nice to nobody
Don't feel like smilin no
Don't feel like smilin no no
See I already know that I'm talkin
PMS

And I don't need you to remind me
See cause PMS
Is takin no all right now
if you understand, understand where I'm comin from
Sing along, PMS
This is the worst part of everything
The worst part of being a woman is PMS
Give me a break, give me a break
Cause I don't wanna have to set it on tonight

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/maryjblige/pms.html

Why, Why Georgia WHY?????

Why Georgia
I am driving up 85 in the kind of morning
That lasts all afternoon, I'm just stuck inside the gloomFour more exits to my apartment
But I am tempted to keep the car in drive and leave it all behind'Cause I wonder sometimes about the outcome of a still verdict less life

Am I living it right, am I living it right?
Am I living it right
Why, why Georgia, why?

I rent a room and I fill the spaces with wood in places
To make it feel like home but all I feel's alone
It might be a quarter life crisis, just a stirrin' in my soulEither way I wonder sometimes about the outcome of a still verdict less life

Am I living it right, am I living it right?
Am I living it right?
Why, why Georgia, why?

So what, so I've got a smile on
But it's hiding the quiet superstitions in my head
Don't believe me, don't believe me when I say I've got it down

Everybody's just a stranger but that's the danger in going my own wayI guess it's a price I have to pay, still everything happens for a reason
Is no reason not to ask myself if I'm living it right

Am I living it right, am I living it right?
Why tell me, why
Why, why Georgia, why?


http://www.elyrics.net/read/j/john-mayer-lyrics/why-georgia-lyrics.html


I knew I wasnt the only person who wondered why if they're living their life right..... WHY?????

Unrealistic Expectations!

Most little girls fall asleep with the expectation that being the best person they can be will definitely guarantee them the love of their life and a happy family life. I guess I'm having a hard time accepting all the realities that are my adult years. Funny how a positive outlook can depend on the approval of another. I know its just around that time when everything seems dark for me. But it doesn't make it seem any easier. Bleeding heart! I struggle to make the right choices these days. Knowing what's right in your mind, and denying what's in your heart is not something that comes easily. Tomorrow's a new day, hopefully full beautiful beginnings and a fresh start.

Come to Me!

"Come To Me"

[Intro]
Baby, there's something that I just wanna tell you
And, you know I never needed you more than I need you right now
And I swallow my pride and
I'm really ready to listen
Just come to me
Tell me I'm the one

Oh baby, come to me
Say you'll love me over
I really need to be
Your one and only lover
I can give you what you need
Say you'll love over
Oh can't you love me over again

Said I need to know
About the way you're feeling, baby
Cuz in my heart love just wants to grow, oh
So I'll move it slow
Because there's no real way of knowing
If you feel the same and want to show, show me

Oh baby, come to me
Say you'll love me over
I really need to be
Your one and only lover
I can give you what you need
Say you'll love over
Oh can't you love me over again

You're my baby girl
And nothing else could ever matter
When we love I just can't get enough
But if we move too fast
Then we regret the morning after
When will there be time enough for us, for us

Oh baby, come to me
Say you'll love me over
I really need to be
Your one and only lover
I can give you what you need
Say you'll love over
Oh can't you love me over again

You make me feel so brand new
I just wanna spend my time with you
And I'll never let someone so true
I just wanna love you over

Oh baby, come to me
Say you'll love me over
I really need to be
Your one and only lover
I can give you what you need
Say you'll love over
Oh can't you love me over again

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/carlthomas/cometome.html

My song to my bestie!

"Dreaming With A Broken Heart"

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part
You roll outta bed and down on your knees
And for the moment you can hardly breathe
Wondering was she really here?
Is she standing in my room?
No she's not, 'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone....

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The giving up is the hardest part
She takes you in with your crying eyes
Then all at once you have to say goodbye
Wondering could you stay my love?
Will you wake up by my side?
No she can't, 'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone....

Oooooooooohhhhhhhhh

Now do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand
Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Baby won't you get them if i did?
No you won't, 'cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone....
When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/johnmayer/dreamingwithabrokenheart.html

New Boyfriend

What's the best way to get over an old boyfriend???? THAT RIGHT! Move on to the new boyfriend. What's the saying you cant keep a good woman down? Its so true. I'm all smiles at all the possibilities!

Pathetic

So you see this hand right here pointing at me. This pathetic excuse for a man really tried to pull this stunt on me. Did you really resort to complete and total disrespect. At first I got MAD at the fist and I wanted to respond in RAGE! But then I realized something and it calmed me down. Look at that fist. What do you see? YES! The protruding finger point at your which initially gets all of our attention right! OK, and then you see the thumb nail. But what about those three fingers? Who are they pointing at? You stick one finger at me not realizing the THREE pointing back at you! Any time a person resorts to trying to rob you of your self worth is only an example of how worthless they feel. If you were content with yourself how could you possibly attempt something that should be so beneath you and I? Your transference of aggression will not work here. You feel worthless and out of control! You feel like a loser! How dare I be happy and content in my life without you? I should be all broken up because you "say" you don't want me. Like I told you, I DON'T WANT YOU! And anything you say to me is irrelevant. Please think about the next word that you choose because they can and WILL be held against YOU!

A real Boy

This morning I was thinking about how you're a real boy. A real live fleshly person, with feelings and emotions. And no matter how hard you try, you cant mask them from me. You get angry because although you try to play those big boy games, when it comes to me your under belly is exposed. Now let me admit to you, my intentions towards you were the same. Let me tell you I wasn't looking at you as the real person you are. I was simply looking for a fix to fill in the blank at the moment. HORRIBLE I know, and didn't I learn my lesson the last time I went there with you. Hey, I'm imperfect, do we ever truly learn? Seems like I keep bumping my head when it comes to you. You pretend like you're OK with being a toy. And you keep fighting the struggle within to be acknowledged as a real boy. Sweetheart, you're fighting a losing battle. Sweetheart, you're fighting a battle that you cant win. Sooner or later you gotta drop your shields and let someone in. Sooner or later you gotta learn to stop pushing everyone away. Instead of getting better, with time you've only gotten worse. And if you don't stop it you will be alone. But as for me, since you've still got so much to figure out on your journey I cant be a party to it. Sorry sweetheart I gotta go the other way. if you need me, tell me. If you want me, say it. But reading your mind I cant. Taking a back seat to your craziness I can not. Waiting for you to materialize is like watching paint dry, long tedious and boring! As much as it hurts me to leave you like this, I gotta move on.

Giving Up!

Giving up is hard to do
When you really love someone
Giving up .... so hard to do
When you still depend upon
His warm and tender touch
His kiss and his hug..........his caress
Oooooh that used to mean so much
And bring you happiness
Woooo ooooooooh

Giving up, so hard to do
I've tried
But it just ain't no use
Giving up, so hard to do
I said I've tried
But it just ain't no use
But my light of hope is burning dim
But
But in my heart I pray
That my love and faith in the man
My love...will bring him back someday

I'm talking 'bout when you really love someone

Whether
Whether he knows or not
He really needs me tooThe man is all I got
Yes he is
And giving, giving up is hard to do
Giving up
So hard to do
Heey...giving up
So very hard to do
I said I've tried
Hey, but I just can't get loose
Giving up
So hard for me to do
I don't want to lose you
Cause you mean so much to me

http://www.stlyrics.com/songs/d/donnyhathaway6550/givingup248218.html

U + UR HaNd!

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Check it out
Going out
On the late night
Looking tight
Feeling nice
It's a **** fight
I can tell
I just know
That it's going down
Tonight
At the door we don't wait cause we know them
At the bar six shots just beginning
That's when dick head put his hands on me
But you see

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh

Midnight
I'm drunk
I don't give a ***k
Wanna dance
By myself
Guess you're outta luck
Don't touch
Back up
I'm not the one
Buh bye
Listen up it's just not happening
You can say what you want to your boyfriends
Just let me have my fun tonight
Aiight

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Break break
Break it down

In the corner with your boys you bet 'em five bucks
You'd get the girl that just walked in but she thinks you suck
We didn't get all dressed up just for you to see
So quit spilling your drinks on me yeah

You know who you are
High fivin, talking ****, but you're going home alone arentcha?

Cause I'm not here for your entertainment
No
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight
It's just you and your hand

I'm not here for your entertainment
No no no
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
Just take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight
Yeah oh
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/pink/uurhand.html

So just in case you couldnt tell.... I'm hurting over here. But I'll be ok!

SO WHAT!!!!!!!!

Na na na na na na na na na na na na [x2]
I guess I just lost my husband,
I don't know where he went,
So I'm gonna drink my money,
I'm not gonna pay his rent,
I got a brand new attitude and
I'm gonna wear it tonight,
I wanna get in trouble,
I wanna start a fight,
na na na na na na na I wanna start a fight,
na na na na na na na I wanna start a fight.

[Chorus:]
So, so what
I'm still a rock star,
I got my rock moves,
And I don't need you,
And guess what,
I'm having more fun,
And now that we’re done,
I'm gonna show you tonight,
I'm alright,
I'm just fine,
And you're a tool,
So, so what,
I am a rock star,
I got my rock moves,
And I don't want you tonight.

(Uh check my flow, aw)
The waiter just took my table,
And gave it to Jessica Simps (shit!),
I guess I'll go sit with drum boy,
At least he'll know how to hit,
What if this song's on the radio,
then somebody's gonna die,
I'm gonna get in trouble,
My ex will start a fight,
na na na na na na na he's gonna start a fight,
na na na na na na na we're all gonna get in a fight!

[Chorus]

You weren't there,
You never were,
You want it all,
But that's not fair,
I gave you life,
I gave my all,
You weren't there,
You let me fall.

[Chorus]

No, no, no, no
I don't want you tonight,
You weren't there,
I'm gonna show you tonight,
I'm alright,
And you're a tool,
And your a tool,
So, so what,
I am a rock star,
I got my rock moves,
And I don't want you tonight!

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/pink/sowhat.html

Rolling in the Deep!

There's a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, it's bringing me out the dark
Finally I can see you crystal clear
Go 'head and sell me out and I'll lay your ship bare
See how I leave with every piece of you
Don't underestimate the things that I will do

There's a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch
And it's bringing me out the dark
The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
I can't help feeling
We could have it all(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)You had my heart inside your hand(You're gonna wish you never had met me)And you played it, to the beat(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

Baby, I have no story to be told
But I've heard one on you
And I'm gonna make your head burn
Think of me in the depths of your despair
Make a home down there
As mine sure won't be shared

(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
The scars of your love remind me of us
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
I can't help feeling
We could have had it all
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)You had my heart inside your hand(You're gonna wish you never had met me)And you played it, to the beat(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)Could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart inside your hand
But you played it, with a beating
Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look forTurn my sorrow into treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
We could have had it all
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
We could have had it all
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
It all, it all, it all
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

We could have had it all
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside your hand
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

We could have had it all
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)

But you played it
You played it
You played it
You played it to the beat.
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/adele/rollinginthedeep.html

Ordinary People

[Verse 1]
Girl im in love with you
This ain't the honeymoon
Past the infatuation phase
Right in the thick of love
At times we get sick of love
It seems like we argue everyday

[Bridge]

I know i misbehaved
And you made your mistakes
And we both still got room left to grow
And though love sometimes hurts
I still put you first
And we'll make this thing work
But I think we should take it slow

[Chorus]

We're just ordinary people
We don't know which way to go
Cuz we're ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we'll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we'll take it slow

[Verse 2]

This ain't a movie no
No fairy tale conclusion ya'll
It gets more confusing everyday
Sometimes it's heaven sent
Then we head back to hell again
We kiss then we make up on the way

[Bridge]

I hang up you call
We rise and we fall
And we feel like just walking away
As our love advances
We take second chances
Though it's not a fantasy
I Still want you to stay

[Chorus]

We're just ordinary people
We don't know which way to go
Cuz we're ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we'll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we'll take it slow

[Verse 3]

Take it slow
Maybe we'll live and learn
Maybe we'll crash and burn
Maybe you'll stay, maybe you'll leave,
maybe you'll return
Maybe another fight
Maybe we won't survive
But maybe we'll grow
We never know baby youuuu and I

[Chorus]

We're just ordinary people
We don't know which way to go
Cuz we're ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Heyyy)
We're just ordinary people
We don't know which way to go
Cuz we're ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we'll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we'll take it slow

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/johnlegend/ordinarypeople.html

Read between the lines

Obviously someone has told you wrong. It has taken awhile but I am not that little girl who was so in-love with you that it didn't matter that you didn't have the same love for me back. You have come to me with no real offer, nothing that I long for today. I guess if I wasn't selfish we would be PERFECT for each other... but alas I am. My love has to mutually transpire on a level you cannot reach... Read between the lines sweetheart, we may love each other. But we're not properly suited... step back and do the right thing.

Time and space

Although I had companions in my life, my family wasn't complete. A silent request to my father provided for an escape for me within my ambiguous state. After many years of growing falling in and out of love with you. Here we sit today, separate and a part. Try to fight it, I will not. Accept it I will. Truth is, our time has come and past. Guess I was the last to know it, guess I was the last to understand it. After conversing with my Father I get it, let it go I will. What we had was special but not applicable today. Time and space separate us. Circumstance and realities take us to separate sides of the fence. Nothing to be angry about, its just the way things happen sometimes.

The Watchers

Irritation in my skin and soul. I know that blogs are public. I know that anyone could stumble across this. Anyone could discover my thoughts and even watch them evolve. BUT what bothers me is the people who repeatedly visit maybe even anonymously follow, but don't make their selves known. Judging and reading in private, sneaking to understand me, but an occasional "hey" would be nice. So for those who actually take the time to drop a line even if its only once in a blue moon, thank you for making your presence known. For those who read, come back and read more, but NEVER SPEAK!!!!! Hmmmmmm.... I think I'm gonna shut this one down open a completely new one and not leave a trail like I have now... if your stalker ways lead you to my new spot... I guess that shows how ridiculous you are.

DEEP BREATH!!!!! DEEP BREATH!!!! DEEP BREATH!!!!!

OK so now that I got that out of the way, where I am serious that bothers me. I'm OK...

I guess that tomorrow I will figure out what I plan to do about this page.... Maybe I'm too emotional.